This last week I switched up my routine a little. I *had* been writing in my journal right after I got the kids on the bus. And then I *had* been going for a run after that. I’ve been writing in my journal near daily since last March…and I loved it. I’ve been running pretty consistently now for almost a full year. And both of those habits seem like really, really good ones.
I felt like my journal helped me organize my thoughts, gave me time to sit and *be*. It helped me clarify goals and sort out confusing situations. I looked forward to it every morning. And running…well…it’s just good for you, right? What a great habit to be nurturing!
But one morning I needed to just get started on my to-do list and if I delayed it to fit in my journal writing and running, I’d be delaying things by over an hour. And so, I skipped my good habits and I got right to work. And I’ve been skipping them ever since.
And…I feel a little guilty admitting this…but I love it. I feel a twinge of rebellious-bad-girl. I feel this strange sort of liberation. Like I’m a taking a break from trying to get everything right…in a way that sort of feels healthy…
and productive! Because, now, with these extra 90 minutes, in my most alert, refreshed, industrious part of my day…I feel like I get more done. Well…I DO get more done! The kids-just-on-the-bus time is a great time to knock off the little things hanging over my head…before I start the real work of the day (and lately, with all the projects Dave and I have going on, each day is marked for specific work..all of which needs to be wrapped up by 3…when the kids get OFF the bus).
And so for now, my running shoes are taking a break. My journal is too. But my blog is thriving, my own sense of accomplishment is being nurtured and I feel like I am embracing what I need and want to do…instead of what I should do. And in time, I think running and journaling will call to me again and slide out of the ‘should’ category and back into the ‘need and want’ category. And when that happens, I’ll be ready.
And you find time to make elaborate Halloween cookies, you ask? Yes, I DO! Because making my apartment “home” to my family…and marking the holidays with baking and crafting…leaves me feeling nurtured. Honestly, the boys wouldn’t care if I bought Halloween cookies from the store, or if I made them myself…but I care. So part of my week, a few hours on Mondays and Fridays, is carved out specifically for projects like this. It’s been interesting to see, when my work week starting filling to capacity, what could be set aside and what could not. And a little “project time” turned out to be unbudge-able. :) And I’m really grateful for the flexibility I DO have to continue to make time for these things that, it turns out, are really important to me.