getting it together

I’ve started the process of getting Isaac into Andrew’s program for Kindergarten next year. And so far it’s just been a few emails, one form and a follow up phone call. This process will probably be on the smooth side, since I know where I want Isaac to go and I know the steps to take to get him there. All of the tasks associated with this so far have been pretty mundane…but it still feels like a really big deal. I keep bringing it up with my friends “I am working on getting Isaac into Andrew’s program” and then I pause so they can have a huge reaction of “OH MY GOODNESS!”…except they never do. :) There’s really nothing to “oh my goodness” about.

But I still feel SOOOO “OH MY GOODNESS!” about it.

I’ve been thinking about Isaac’s Kindergarten year since Andrew was in Kindergarten. I’ve been strategizing on how to avoid what happened with Andrew. I’ve been hovering over Isaac’s development to see if he’d even be ready for the type of program Andrew is in. I’ve been keeping an eye on other kids in Andrew’s program and worrying nervously “are any of these kids like Isaac?” because if I could spot one like Isaac…then I’d be more settled into thinking that this IS the program for him.

Yesterday the head of the program called me to talk me through the next steps. Andrew got in this program in its first year and the process was very unusual. But now they have their systems in place and she told me how it will all work.

But…she started the conversation with “oh. You have two kids on the spectrum. That must be very hard.” I get this from time to time…and from people that I really don’t expect it from…and I NEVER know what to say. As she said that I was up to my elbows in cupcake batter listening to Halloween music. It certainly didn’t feel very hard. :) I was quiet for a minute as I tried to figure out what to say “well…” I said, “I feel like I’ve become a specialized parent. I know how to parent autistic boys…but I don’t know WHAT I’d do with a little girl!” And she must not have heard me right because she said “that’s right. You are a very special parent.” ??? What??

Everyone I’ve talked to thinks that this won’t be problem. They think Isaac will be joining Andrew next year at his school. I definitely take comfort in that…but I also remind myself that if something happens…and Isaac’s school experience totally falls apart and he ends up in a place that’s a terrible fit…that’s ok. I’ve handled that before. I don’t want to do it again, but I can if I need to.

Last night I dreamed that I was taking a cross-country trip with both boys. But…we were traveling, all three of us, on a motorcycle, in the rain…and we got a very late start. I’ve had dreams like this before when I’m sorting out things for the boys. Over breakfast I asked Andrew what he dreamed last night and he said “I dreamed you brought me a dozen cupcakes!” Indeed.

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About robyn

I stopped teaching Kindergarten in 2005 to become the mom of two crazy boys here in Brooklyn. At first I thought being a stay at home mom meant that I needed to pour all my time and energy directly into my sons, but I realized somewhere along the way that being a rockstar mom meant not only taking good care of my boys, but also taking good care of myself. And taking good care of myself means pursuing something creative...just about everyday. I started Made In Brooklyn to motivate myself in my creative goals as well as share my work with others and perhaps inspire them in their own creative journeys.
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One Response to getting it together

  1. Mama V says:

    i hope the transition to elementary school for isaac goes smoothly! won’t it be a lovely day when you’ll finally have two boys in one school location again?! (i can’t wait!)

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